“Imagine all the people living life in peace. You may say I'm a dreamer, but I'm not the only one. I hope someday you'll join us, and the world will be as one.” -John LennonWhen Dane first arrived to live with us, it was autumn and we'd sit outside on the patio for hours. We talked about music, pain, God, movies, camp, and Ashley. It was in one of those talks where I was schooled in the “appreciation” of AC\DC. One night we came upon the subject of The Beatles. Now let me out myself to you all, in the same way I outed myself to Dane that night. I am fairly Beatles ignorant. So I got educated, I learned why Sgt. Pepper is the greatest rock album ever, and why Yellow Submarine is still a more important album, or something like that. Although I am sure the Beatles fans can correct me as to the details of my “lesson” that night, for me the thing I remember most was transitioning into talking about John Lennon. For those of you who have never picked up on it, I am a bit of a hippie, so Lennon was a subject I could get into. Talking about Lennon, got us talking about 'Imagine.' Talking about 'Imagine' got us talking about God. That's how it was, our conversations were tapestries, and I am bundled up in the warmth of the memories tonight as I face this cold news.
Dane is not here anymore, as Christi put it so eloquently tonight, “the piece of God that lived in Dane is what I will miss” I agree. There is more to Dane that I will miss than I could possibly write in a letter like this.
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I'm back, after 15 minutes of more crying, punching a wall, and still more tears, I am back. I won't pretend that life in the Bowman house is a field of roses, there were good times and bad times. That's what it means to be part of a family. Dane was family.
I am sure many of you have similar experiences. Dane was so talented at making people feel loved. I loved to watch him insert himself and love people. I know many of you were the recipients of that love. Dane talked, laughed, played, and dreamed with you. You love Dane, because you too have memories of that laughter, of those games, and of your shared dreams.
I have such wonderful memories to treasure up. The night we talked about The Beatles, Lennon, & Imagine, we dreamed together too. We dreamed of a retreat that would be shaped around these themes of God we both loved in the lyrics of the song. We dreamed of a retreat called Imagine. We even designed the T-Shirt. We realized eventually, this retreat was a futile, since some people would be pretty offended by a retreat based on lyrics by John Lennon. Still I treasure that we dreamed a lot together.
Treasure up your memories of Dane. Remember his mom, his aunt Cyndi, his girlfriend Ashley, and those others close to him as they mourn. Remember to thank God, for how you felt loved, and maybe learned to love better because of Dane. Remember Dane for what he meant to you, and to your sense of being in family with him.
I know my family seems one person smaller tonight.
In Memory Dane Potts:
May 20, 1990 – March 10,2010